Bah.. I'm so disapppointed. And yet so excited. I'm awash with conflicting emotions. Let me 'splain.
First, we lost all three of our volleyball games tonight. That's bad. But we played pretty well. That's good. I wasn't all taht happy with my playing, but I'm blaming most of it on my possibly broken right pinky. It hurts like hell, it's all swollen and bruised. Also bad.
On to the good.
My fourth-day-of-birthday-week present was an M-Audio Omni Studio, a Marshall MXL 1006 microphone, and a mic stand. So now I've got lots of new toys to play with, and hopefully I'll soon be making beautiful music together. At the very least, I'll be able to record myself doing something, even if it's swearing and kicking the furniture because I can't figure out how all the stuff works. I'm suddenly feeling like my computer will actually be getting some use. It sits here, night and day, running this website and a few other menial tasks, but rarely anything worthy of it's wacky ridiculous power.
I'm not installing anything tonight, though, I'm practicing restraint.
My Monday present was some honey stix, Tuesday was a brand new Therma-rest (much needed), and Wednesday was a Therma-rest easy chair sling. It's been a good birthday week, and still 3 days to go.
Okay, what I was originally going to talk about, the reason I was disappointed, is this: I installed some new statistics reporting, log analyzing software yesterday, so I can better keep track of whose looking at what on my site. Luke had recently posted that he gets anywhere from 80-150 page views a day on his site, and I was feeling jealous. My old way involved tracking individual pages through Nedstat, which had some benefits, but not many. In fact, I can't think of one. I'm now using Awstats, which is cooler for any number of reasons, none of which will I bore you with here. If this kind of thing is your bag (baby), you check it out your own self.
Moving on. With the new tool, I can more easily see how people are getting to my site, whether it's through an external link, a search engine, or what. Some hits are just only hits on assets on my server, not actual page views. Let me explain. If someone links to an image on my site, then when you view their web site, it sends a request to my server for the image, and I record that image hit. Got it? Good. So I saw one weird hit from a random link and I clicked on it. (Man, this story would be so much better if the page was still up.. more on that later). I was instantly confronted with a picture of a man sitting on a giant penis. I mean 7 or 8 feet. Naturally it wasn't real, nor, in all likelihood, his. As I scrolled down, wondering how this page could possibly be linked to my site, I was scanning a treasure chest of pictures of people on, under, and near cartoonishly large penises of every stripe. Paper mache, drivable penis cars, penis snow sculptures, you name it. So I'm scrolling down, thinking there must be some mistake, and about half way down the page, there it is; a picture of me.
(Again, I must reiterate how disappointed I am that this page has been removed. Deeply, deeply disappointed.)
Want to see the picture? Here it is. It's from the sex museum in Amsterdam, taken in 1996 when I was on my way to India with Erik and Zach.
Apparently, someone decided to make a page of pictures showing people with extremely large penises, and there I was, about 10 from the top. I'm so proud.
