Onion headline from January, 2001, a few days before Bush's inauguration:
Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare of Peace and Prosperity is Finally Over'
And here's a version of the article, annotated with hyperlinks to news sources showing how much of this "parody" has actually come to pass. What was once an hilarious joke has come unhilariously true.
Bush swore to do "everything in [his] power" to undo the damage wrought by Clinton's two terms in office, including selling off the national parks to developers, going into massive debt to develop expensive and impractical weapons technologies, and passing sweeping budget cuts that drive the mentally ill out of hospitals and onto the street.
During the 40-minute speech, Bush also promised to bring an end to the severe war drought that plagued the nation under Clinton, assuring citizens that the U.S. will engage in at least one Gulf War-level armed conflict in the next four years.
"You better believe we're going to mix it up with somebody at some point during my administration," said Bush, who plans a 250 percent boost in military spending. "Unlike my predecessor, I am fully committed to putting soldiers in battle situations. Otherwise, what is the point of even having a military?"
The whole thing should be required reading. This isn't funny anymore.
